It’s another one of those days here at Compound de Dude. We’re all sitting around, rubbing our temples and trying to come to terms with the fact that it’s been 17 years since Zippy the Monkey Boy popped into the world like a watermelon seed flying into the air.
No, really. He did shoot out when he was delivered. He was in such a hurry to get out into the world and start getting some experiences that didn’t get filtered through that ghastly red light and all those loud sooshings and thumpings.
For the fourth year in a row, we’ll not be celebrating Zippy the Monkey Boy’s birthday here at the compound. Each of the last four years, Zippy has chosen to be at camp, rather than at home when his birthday rolls around. I guess it’s something about being with friends, or having people other than his family think he’s even more special for the day. Maybe it’s so he can get to have two parties: One on the day of his birth and one on the day of his choosing when he gets back to the compound. Or something like that. Whatever the reason, the young dude surely loves to be elsewhere on his birthday.
He’s an interesting dude, is our Zippy. He is probably one of the most straight-up stubborn people I’ve ever met. Now if only we could get him to use his powers for good, rather than evil, all would be well. His stubborn streak can occasionally come in handy when he has to power through some tough homework or do something that’s difficult. Mostly, though, he’s using that stubbornness to bring up yet again why he should be allowed to stay out until 11 pm on a school night.
One of the great things about our Zippy is that he’s really fun to talk to. No, seriously. A teenager who’s fun to talk with. He’s often got a unique perspective on things that are going on and, even when he’s so wildly off base it’s appalling, he always manages to make an eloquent case. Considering most teenaged dudes make arguments through grunts and snorts, that’s pretty impressive.
Even though you’re not here, Zippy the Monkey Boy, we’re thinking about you and wishing you were here. And not just because then we wouldn’t have to be paying all that money for marine science camp.
Happy birthday, Zippy. You are loved and cherished.