Every once in a while, there comes a picture that is so awesome, so fantastic, so amazing it would be a crime not to share it with as many people as possible.
I’ve actually stumbled upon one of those pictures. I’m going to go ahead and show the picture now and then talk about it later
because you dudes and dudettes really do need to see this picture.
It’s not photoshopped. It actually happened.
According to a Facebook post from the ORB Lab, its researchers were out in Delaware Bay searching for tagged sharks as part of an effort to better understand shark behavior. What they came up with is in that photo: It’s a dogfish being swallowed by a sand tiger shark.
Again, yes. Seriously.
We caught one large female on our first line Friday, but we were not expecting to catch her like this! This unlucky smooth dogfish couldn’t resist the menhaden used as bait and, unfortunately, fell victim to one of the top predators in the bay. The dogfish was about 3 feet (1 meter) long and completely swallowed by the sand tiger shark.
ORB Lab, by the way, stands for Ocean exploration, Remote sensing, Biogeography Laboratory and is based out of the University of Delaware in Newark, DE.
After reading through the post and marveling at the picture for a while, I made the mistake of cruising through the comments. I say mistake because it reminded me that there are some people who consider episodes I, II, and III to be actual parts of the Star Wars movie sequence. (They aren’t. They’re only a mass hallucination, brought on by a bad bit of beef or something.) Anyway, the commenter had a good quote: “There’s always a bigger fish.”
I guess the smooth dogfish found that out, poor little dude.
I can only be happy for the researchers that they didn’t find the rest of the drawing, because the fish at the end of the line would have sported one huge set of jaws. What drawing, you ask? Why, this one of course.
The little fish says, “There is no justice in the world.” The middle fish says, “There is some justice in the world.” The big fish says, “The world is just.” Again, I’m guessing the big fish says that because she hasn’t taken the time to look behind her in a little while.
It’s a sports axiom: There’s always someone better than you, stronger than you, faster than you, bigger than you. But do you want it more? Okay, sure, that probably motivates in sports, but I really don’t see the dogfish turning the tables on the sand tiger shark. Although that probably would have made for an even better picture.
*Yes, I realize the title isn’t completely accurate, but, come on. Did you actually think I would pass up the opportunity to use a pun this awful and horrible out in public? No, of course I wouldn’t. I don’t think I could pass this one up even if I wanted to leave it alone. Which I didn’t. Clearly.
Look out, world. Today is the day Zippy the Monkey Boy turns 18.
It’s the day he’s been looking forward to for a long, long time. He likes to think that, just because the law considers him an adult now, that he’ll be treated like an adult here at Casa de Dude.
His mom and I don’t like to disillusion him* about stuff like this, but he’s really not going to be treated as if he’s a house guest. Okay, we’ll probably not cut up his food and wipe his mouth for him, but he’s still a kid in our hearts.
At least until he’s the one who pays for dinner when we go out, but that’s a separate thing entirely.
Today, we come to praise Zippy the Monkey Boy, not to bury him.
With a name like Zippy the Monkey Boy, you’d think he was the one who was always running around, knocking things over and flinging poop all over the walls. He was. But that wasn’t why he got the name. He got the name because he took to climbing like greased-up pigs take to sliding.
He never did learn to crawl. Instead, he kept low crawling until he could stand up and walk. He wanted the extra height, you see.
Once he got up on two feet, it was only a matter of time until he started seeing the fences and stuff we’d put up around the play area, not as a thing blocking his way so he’d better turn around, but as another toy, something we put there so he could have fun climbing and dropping.
That was what we listened to when he was a baby. That thump. We’d hear it and know he’d found his way over another obstacle and we should be expecting his arrival any moment. Diapers were a wonderful thing for Zippy the Monkey Boy. Great cushion. Of course, if it were already a full diaper before he climbed and dropped, we got to clean a lot of flung stuff after.
He’s kept it up. One of my favorite pictures of him shows him high up in a tree, screaming out his triumph for having climbed that high. He was 15 when we took that picture. He likes to climb is what I’m saying.
His other most distinguishing feature through the years has been his love of animals. This is a little dude that has wanted to be a zoologist since he knew someone could actually tell people he was going to study animals all his life and people would be okay with it. Now he’s going off to one of the best marine science schools in the country so he can make the study of sharks his life work. If nothing else, it shows he’s able to find a goal and stick with it.
Zippy the Monkey Boy is getting ready to head off to Wilmington to try his act out down there, along the beaches, among the co-eds and out on his (metaphorical) own. Sure I’m worried.
But only a little. I have the feeling Zippy the Monkey Boy is going to keep on climbing, always reaching for something just out of his reach and finding a way to get it and then seeing the next thing just a little higher up.
It’s been an adventurous 18 years. I can’t wait to see what the next 18 bring.
Ook, Ook, Zip.
*no, that’s a lie. We love disillusioning him. It’s such fun.