As much as I love fall, this year’s is proving to be a bit more difficult than normal. You see, Sarcasmo is a senior in high school this year and that means it’s college application time.

Oh, yeah. You can bet that’s going well.

The problem, you see, is that Sarcasmo is like a lot of typical [...]]]> by Richard

As much as I love fall, this year’s is proving to be a bit more difficult than normal. You see, Sarcasmo is a senior in high school this year and that means it’s college application time.

Oh, yeah. You can bet that’s going well.

The problem, you see, is that Sarcasmo is like a lot of typical young dudes. That is, he’d like to do the least amount possible. For anything. Which means when he sees the word optional in a college application form, he thinks that means it’s actually optional. Instead of a one-word euphemism for “You must do this or you have no chance whatsoever of ever actually attempting to darken our doors, you scum.”

I might be overstating the case there. Slightly. But not by much.

The good news is that most colleges accept — nay, encourage — you to apply online. Those online applications are great, even if only for one reason: you don’t need to use a bottle of white out per page.

Back in the dark ages when I was preparing my college applications, I had to hand write or type every single bit. Which meant when I did make mistakes, and I did make mistakes, I had to either start over with a brand-new application, filling in all the stuff I’d already filled in, or I had to whip out the white out. Neither of which option was all that great.

Being a young dude, I compensated by only applying to two colleges. Fortunately, it was an earlier age and you could actually get into an out-of-state college fairly easily and, frankly, I got lucky.

Sarcasmo doesn’t have that first out and we can’t rely on the second.

Which makes working with him on all those short answers all the more fun. One leading question consisted of “My friends would be surprised if they knew what about me?” He had 250 words for his response. His answer, before I got out the whip and the chair, was nine words, including “My friends would be surprised if. . . ”

And the good news is I get to do this again next year when it’s Zippy the Monkey Boy’s turn in the barrel.

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The middle young dude, Zippy the Monkey Boy, goes to a private school, which means we pay (out the nose) for his education. And the lovely thing is this means it’s like he’s going to college for four years before he goes to college.

Anyway, there are times when he’s overjoyed to be going there and [...]]]> by Richard

The middle young dude, Zippy the Monkey Boy, goes to a private school, which means we pay (out the nose) for his education. And the lovely thing is this means it’s like he’s going to college for four years before he goes to college.

Anyway, there are times when he’s overjoyed to be going there and I’m a little suspect. Today is one of those times.

Every year, the high school portion of his school packs up and the young dudes and dudettes head out to camp. Yes, they’re going to Camp Cheerio, the same place Zippy the Monkey Boy, Hyper Lad and Sarcasmo, have spent so many happy summer months.

Now, the school says this three-day excursion is an exercise in team building and getting the students into a different setting to work on their educations and their approach to learning.

Me? I’m thinking it’s more of a mini-vacation for a group of students, who already have far too many days off during the school year.

Yes, I am turning into a grumpy old man. Why do you ask?

Zippy the Monkey Boy loves it, though, so I’ve decided to quit griping. At least in public. Well, at least where he’s likely to notice it anyway.

The good news is that it’ll be two days where I won’t have to actually dynamite the young dude out of bed on school mornings and that’s always good for my blood pressure.

So, I guess, cheers!

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Still recovering from the College Road Trip 2010, which would help to explain why I thought yesterday was Sunday. Well, that and being dropped on my head — repeatedly — as a child.

Speaking of the College Road Trip 2010, I was doing a little thinking about distances. Not metaphorical distances, mind you, but actual distances. [...]]]> by Richard

Still recovering from the College Road Trip 2010, which would help to explain why I thought yesterday was Sunday. Well, that and being dropped on my head — repeatedly — as a child.

Speaking of the College Road Trip 2010, I was doing a little thinking about distances. Not metaphorical distances, mind you, but actual distances. As in, how many freakin’ miles did I put in the rear-view mirror over the last week or so. I thought I’d give it a run down.

Charlotte to Wilmington: 4 hours, 200 miles

Wilmington to Greenville, NC: 2 hours 20 minutes, 130 miles

Greenville, NC, to Charleston, SC: 5 hours 20 minutes, 340 miles

Charleston, SC, to Conway, SC: 2 hours, 100 miles

Conway, SC, to Statesboro, GA: 4 hours 30 minutes, 270 miles

Statesboro, GA, to Glade Valley, NC (to pick up Hyper Lad from camp): 6 hours, 350 miles

Glade Valley, NC, to Charlotte, NC: 2 hours, 112 miles.

You know, when I look at it that way, I’m pretty much sure I really did suffer some sort of brain injury recently. That’s 26 hours behind the wheel, driving a total of 1,500 miles.

Good FSM! I must have been absolutely crazy. When Zippy the Monkey Boy and I were in the midst of this, I didn’t think it was that bad, really. There were a couple of long days, but, breaking it up with a night at a hotel between each leg, it didn’t seem all that bad.

Now, though, I’m thinking that when it’s Hyper Lad’s turn to get a College Road trip 2015, it’s going to be something nice and virtual. Even know I’m having a hard time getting behind the wheel of the car to go anywhere.

Wheels are making me itchy.

Still, it’s probably something I’ll get over. Eventually. Maybe. For now, thought, I’m putting the blame squarely on Zippy the Monkey Boy and his it’s-gotta-be-less-than-an-hour-and-a-half-from-the-beach criteria. Time for him to start paying back.

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