Tag Archives: mess

What Bugs You About Men? What Bugs You About Women?

What bugs you about the opposite gender?

I know I’m setting myself up for a real horribly bad time here, but it’s something I’ve been thinking about for a while.

See, I’m considering a follow up to that wonderful, funny how-to book for new dads, A Dude’s Guide to Babies: The New Dad’s Playbook, and one of the things I’m considering is a treatise that explains men to women. And also explains women to men.

Don’t worry (not that any of you really were worried, I’m sure). I’ve got the whole thing figured out on how I can cram two so disparate things into the same book. Trust me, on this one. It’s going to be a tremendously fun book.

If I can sell it. And, to do that, I need your help.

Speaking in general, what is it that bugs you about the opposite gender?

Now, I’m not talking about, say, the way the second toe on Harold’s right foot is longer than his big toe. However, if you say something like it bugs you that men are always clipping their toenails and leaving the leavings around on the floor, then that’s good.

I’m really looking for examples of broad categories, but I’m open to hearing just about any ideas you’ve got.

Although it’s probably well-trodden ground at this point, I’m considering a bit about how men and women use verbal communication in completely different ways. That is, we use the same words, but they mean something completely different.

No, not an astonishingly original observation, but, as I said, I think I’ve got a new way to look at this that could prove funny. Does it surprise you that I’m going for the funny?

If you want, and, again, if I sell the idea, I’d be happy to use your name or as much of your name as you want used in the book as a source. You can even ask me to change the name to protect the ones who say they are innocent, but aren’t really, which you know because they asked to have their names changed.

If you’re interested in helping out, you can leave messages here in the comments, on our Facebook page, DM me on Twitter at @DudesGuide or use hashtags like #BugMen #BugWomen #BugDude. I’ll be checking any and all of them.

Or you could just send me an e-mail and I’ll happily read and answer whatever I get.

Thanks so much for any help you can give me. Even if you don’t have anything for me right now, think about it and try to get it to me later.

Consider getting in touch. I know there’s something that bugs you about the opposite gender, something that — from your gender’s perspective — makes absolutely no sense.

Let me hear about it, yeah?

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Yet Another Anniversary

Yep. It’s been six years to the day since Sgt. Pepper taught the band to pl–

Er, what I mean to say is that it’s been six years to the day since the first post was published here at A Dude’s Guide to . . . Everything!

I sort of covered this last week when I talked about the 2,000th post, but I just couldn’t help myself from talking about this again.

No, I’m not the type of person to observe the second half-month anniversary of the first time I kissed someone. I’m lucky to remember the anniversary of the day I got married.

Not because it doesn’t matter, but because living with my wife, known to me as She Who Must Be. . . Something Something Something, is so wonderful, it’s hard to believe there ever was a time when I was without her. (Did you dudes know she sometimes reads this blog? Apropos of nothing.)

Anyway, on this day in 2008, Barry posted our first post.

Here it is.

A Dude’s Guide is a funny and insightful look into what it takes for a Dude to be a better person. We are not saying that we are exceptional people but we try. We will use our experiences and adventures and misadventures to try to help other Dude’s learn and contribute to this Blog.

We will start by using our unique viewpoint on fatherhood and the sticky mess made of it by us and (we believe) most men. We will take takes a fresh perspective on such fatherly conundrums as: How do I change a diaper without getting peed on? How, exactly, do I make the little Dude (or Dudette) burp? How do I manipulate their minds to be good people and eat their broccoli?

We hope to make you laugh, learn and contribute at the same time.

Seems like a pretty good mission statement to me. What say we keep doing it for a while?



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Pay No Attention! Nothing To See Here!

by Richard

Linda wore two different pairs of shoes. They were the same style and both were dark-colored, but one was navy blue and one was black. And she didn’t notice it, despite a day of shoe shopping during which she looked at her shoes again and again.

No, Linda isn’t blind or anything like that. Her issue is she’s got, among other things, inattentive-type ADD. Here’s the thing: I’m not sure if this is something only reserved to people who have ADD, but I do know this kind of thing plays out in our house, and probably yours, almost every single day.

Tell me if this situation sounds familiar.

You want something taken upstairs by one of the young dudes in the house, maybe a book of theirs or some kind of notebook or clothing. So, to make sure they see it and get an inkling that you want them to take it upstairs to be put away, you set the item out on the stairs so they have to walk over it or around it every time they go upstairs or downstairs.

Now, to adults and those of you with neurotypical brain functioning, that seems like pretty much a no-brainer. To most teens or to dudes or dudettes with inattentive-type ADD? Not even close.

You: “Did you take that hamper upstairs?”

Him: “What hamper?”

You, exasperated: “That hamper! The one sitting on the stairs! You had to walk around it to get down here!”

Him: “I think you might be getting a little old. I didn’t see a hamper on the stairs.”

Does any of that sound the least bit familiar? I’m thinking it sounds too familiar.

And here’s the thing: They probably aren’t even lying or being lazy. They just didn’t notice. Even though they had to detour around it so they didn’t fall down the stairs.

That’s the way inattentive-type ADD and being a teenager works. Now try combining those two aspects. Yeah, not going to be fun is it?

And it can happen to anyone. Things just disappear into the background. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve set something out on the kitchen counter, knowing I’ll have to walk by it on my way out later that day, so I’ll remember it when I go by. Later in the day, I walk by it and completely miss the item because it’s blended into the background already in my head and doesn’t stand out. I just plain didn’t notice it.

An easy workaround I’ve come up with is, if I have to take something with me when I go out, I’ll go ahead and put it in my messenger bag or in the car as soon as I think about it. That way, when I forget about it when I leave, everything’s all cool because I’ve already got it with me. It’s something I’m trying to pass along to my young dudes and something maybe you might want to give to yours as well.

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