Possibly the best/worst St. Patrick’s Day of my life occurred in college at the University of Florida. Are any of you dudes surprised about that? No, I didn’t think so.
It was also the only day I deliberately, consciously blew off a whole day of class.
And, of course, it all had to do with the green beer.
There was a bar near my fraternity house. The bar was called Riprocks and it was (in)famous for its four-for-one night in which you could purchase one drink and get three more just like it for free. Hey, it was the ’80s. Lay off. We didn’t know any better.
Anyway, this particular St. Patrick’s Day, Riprocks advertised that they would open up at 10 am and be serving green beer all day long at ridiculously low prices and also selling chicken wings (possibly also dyed green. The details escape me.) for cheap. And I got it into my head that I, and a couple of other friends, should go over there and spend the entire St. Patrick’s Day sitting in their outside cafe, drinking green beer and eating chicken wings, even though it was a school day.
And, oddly, that’s just what we did. The thing I remember most is that, at some point during the evening, the sun had gone down and I was running a race against one of the fastest people in my fraternity. I, who was then at my largest, was running a race against the fastest kid I knew, in the middle of the main street in town, at night, after a day of consuming green beer and chicken wings.
Yeah, the fact that I survived college is a bit of a miracle to me as well.
These days, though, things are much different. There’ll be no beer, green or otherwise, although there will be a green Florida Gator shirt because, well, some things don’t changes. And, instead of haunting a bar, I’ll be taking my three young dudes and my wife, known to me as She Who Must Be Appeased With A Musical At Least Once Every Three Months to see a musical.
Of course, the musical is based on Mel Brooks’ movie, Young Frankenstein, because appeasement only goes so far. Still, I think we’re all looking forward to seeing a monster in green instead of a green monster in our glass.