It’s back. After spending most of last week talking about a seminar I attended at The Fletcher School, a fantastic private school for kids with learning disabilities here in Charlotte, NC, I thought I was done. But every time I think I’m out, they pull me back in. Sorry. I just couldn’t help myself. [...]]]> by Richard

It’s back. After spending most of last week talking about a seminar I attended at The Fletcher School, a fantastic private school for kids with learning disabilities here in Charlotte, NC, I thought I was done. But every time I think I’m out, they pull me back in. Sorry. I just couldn’t help myself. If it’s any comfort, you were spared my appalling Al Pacino impression. Anyway, there was one last social skill I wanted to tell you about, since Diane Stewart, The Fletcher School’s k-5 counselor, went to the trouble of telling us all about it.

One particular problem that many, many kids with LD’s have is holding basic conversations with people in a socially acceptable manner. For instance, they might hijack the conversation onto a totally unrelated subject, but one that interests them and of which they have great knowledge. Or they might constantly interrupt and never actually listen to what the other dude has to say. Or not even let other people have a turn talking at all.

So, yeah, just talking to people is a little more difficult for dudes and dudettes with learning disabilities. Through modeling, Stewart suggests, and working diligently with your own little dude or dudette, you can help teach some of the following basic conversation skills.

How to start and end a conversation. Making eye contact by, for instance, looking at a point above one eye if looking people in the eye is uncomfortable. Asking appropriate questions to keep the conversation going. Reading and responding to body language. Sending body language that tells the other person you are interested and enthusiastic. (For this last one, imagine someone leaning forward, sitting on the edge of their seat and looking raptly at you. Then contrast it with someone leaning back in her seat, legs stretched out in front of her, arms crossed and eyes glancing around the room at anything but you. Yeah. I thought you could see this one.) Another skill to learn is adjusting your vocabulary, volume, language and tone to your audience because you wouldn’t talk the same way to your boss as you would one of your old college buddies. Kids with LD’s also might need help recognizing when someone is using figurative language. For instance, some kids with severe LD’s might get upset if a person told them to break a leg before a play. Most kids with LD’s are very literal-minded about language, Stewart said.

Finally, and this should probably apply to most of us, try and help your little dude or dudette to think and reflect before speaking. I think that one should be self-explanatory, but here goes. Does what I’m going to say fit the topic? Is it appropriate? Is it nice or is it mean? Will it get me fired? Thoughts like those can go a long way toward helping make sure you don’t have the conversation that will get you kicked out of the popular kids club.

Now, really, that’s all. I promise. Thanks again to The Fletcher School and Diane Stewart. As always, anything you liked was all because of them. Anything you hated or was wrong, well, that was all me.

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I’d thought that as he grew older (he’s now [...]]]> Some things, it seems, never will change. Take my middle little dude, just as a for instance. Zippy the monkey boy got his name because, as a little little dude, he would climb anything he saw. I mean anything. Couches, legs, counters, trees, fences, cars. Seriously. Anything.

I’d thought that as he grew older (he’s now approaching his 15th birthday) he just might have grown out of it. Turns out I was wrong. Very, very wrong.

When we were at the beach for our family vacation last month, Zippy and I parted ways after the deep-sea fishing trip. He stayed behind to eat lunch with some of the cousins his own age, while I headed into town for a little shopping. What can I say? That’s how I roll.

Anyway, he headed home with the cousins to an empty condo. There was no one home. To top it off, the front and back doors were locked and, he said, he couldn’t find any way in.

So, what did he do? Did he decide to stay with the cousins? Did he ask an adult for help? No. Of course not.

He reverted to type.

Zippy the monkey boy decided to climb up the outside of the condo to the second-story balcony, clamber over the iron railing and then open the sliding-glass door to get inside. Luckily, the sliding-glass door was unlocked and he got in without incident.

Here’s an artist’s conception of Zippy the monkey boy getting into the empty condo.

Considering the artist has never met Zippy, well, let’s just say it’s a pretty good likeness.

– Richard

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However, let us just say we think all sailor suits should be banned permanently and purged from our global memory and retail inventory. But that’s just a personal thing.

What we do [...]]]> We’re not here to tell you what style of clothes you should use to dress your little dude or dudette. That’s really up to you.

However, let us just say we think all sailor suits should be banned permanently and purged from our global memory and retail inventory. But that’s just a personal thing.

What we do want to discuss is not how clothes look, but how they function.

Looks have nothing to do with it. We need clothing that works on my daughter. Looks is something her mother worries about.

There are some baby shorts, pants or pajamas that are all one piece. That is, if you want to take them off, you have to slip them down over wriggling baby legs. When you’re in a hurry because there’s some sort of gas attack coming from the diaper, it’s not that easy to whip those pants off.

We recommend pants, shorts and pajamas that have snaps running up both legs and that meet in the middle. These snaps can be quickly undone, the pants whipped up over the waist and you’ve got quick access to the diaper. Then, when you’re done, you just pull down the pants and snap them up again. It’s quick and relatively painless.

Some clothes you’ll dress your kid in are actually a bit difficult to figure out.

One time, Barry put his youngest daughter in this nice dress that had a cute collar and some buttons running down the back. As soon as his wife walked in she started laughing because, she said, “You put that dress on backwards.”

Which, we think, is acceptable.

Women, you see, have an innate sense for clothing. It’s a mysterious inner knowledge that we, as dudes, will never understand. However, we can use it to learn. If she starts laughing at your pathetic male attempts to dress the little dudette, that’s okay. Just remember that you can always pick out some really awful clothes for the little dudette, take her out in public and then tell everyone her mom picked out all the clothes.

See, now you’ve both learned something.

– Richard and Barry

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