by Richard
It’s back. After spending most of last week talking about a seminar I attended at The Fletcher School, a fantastic private school for kids with learning disabilities here in Charlotte, NC, I thought I was done. But every time I think I’m out, they pull me back in. Sorry. I just couldn’t help myself. If it’s any comfort, you were spared my appalling Al Pacino impression. Anyway, there was one last social skill I wanted to tell you about, since Diane Stewart, The Fletcher School’s k-5 counselor, went to the trouble of telling us all about it.
One particular problem that many, many kids with LD’s have is holding basic conversations with people in a socially acceptable manner. For instance, they might hijack the conversation onto a totally unrelated subject, but one that interests them and of which they have great knowledge. Or they might constantly interrupt and never actually listen to what the other dude has to say. Or not even let other people have a turn talking at all.
So, yeah, just talking to people is a little more difficult for dudes and dudettes with learning disabilities. Through modeling, Stewart suggests, and working diligently with your own little dude or dudette, you can help teach some of the following basic conversation skills.
How to start and end a conversation. Making eye contact by, for instance, looking at a point above one eye if looking people in the eye is uncomfortable. Asking appropriate questions to keep the conversation going. Reading and responding to body language. Sending body language that tells the other person you are interested and enthusiastic. (For this last one, imagine someone leaning forward, sitting on the edge of their seat and looking raptly at you. Then contrast it with someone leaning back in her seat, legs stretched out in front of her, arms crossed and eyes glancing around the room at anything but you. Yeah. I thought you could see this one.) Another skill to learn is adjusting your vocabulary, volume, language and tone to your audience because you wouldn’t talk the same way to your boss as you would one of your old college buddies. Kids with LD’s also might need help recognizing when someone is using figurative language. For instance, some kids with severe LD’s might get upset if a person told them to break a leg before a play. Most kids with LD’s are very literal-minded about language, Stewart said.
Finally, and this should probably apply to most of us, try and help your little dude or dudette to think and reflect before speaking. I think that one should be self-explanatory, but here goes. Does what I’m going to say fit the topic? Is it appropriate? Is it nice or is it mean? Will it get me fired? Thoughts like those can go a long way toward helping make sure you don’t have the conversation that will get you kicked out of the popular kids club.
Now, really, that’s all. I promise. Thanks again to The Fletcher School and Diane Stewart. As always, anything you liked was all because of them. Anything you hated or was wrong, well, that was all me.
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