Tag Archives: Hook

Talking Trauma With Kids

As human beings, it seems we want to put off having talks about uncomfortable subjects for as long as possible.

I’m not sure it’s possible to put off talking about Sandy Hook elementary school for much longer. When I was at Amazing Elementary School, where I work as a tutor, on Monday, there was a lot of talk about the appalling events of Friday, when a sick man walked into an elementary school and killed 20 students, six teachers and staff and then died himself. This after having already killed his mother in the Newtown, Connecticut home they share.

The talk I was hearing didn’t come only from the teachers, worried about their young charges. The students had also heard about what happened.

I was asked several times what I knew about the incident, as if because I was an adult, I would know all there was to know about, well, everything. Yeah, elementary schoolers are still in that trusting phase. Which makes what happened at Sandy Hook all the worse.

Still, dudes, I think it’s something we need to discuss with our young dudes and dudettes. I know I want my kids to hear about my interpretation of what happened.

These kinds of things, no matter horrific and terrible they are, really are rare. Not rare enough, of course, but they’re not something that happens very often.

I want my kids to know, in general, what they need to do if something like this happens in their school. Hiding or running away from the crazy with the gun is a much better idea than running toward.

It’s the talks like this with younger kids, though, that will take the most effort on the part of parents to make sure they understand. They’re going to be completely weirded out that someone would kill kids their own age. The most important thing you can do, according to experts, is remain calm.

If you’re freaking out about the whole thing, there’s no way the kid will hear anything but your fear.

“You want to do it in an open-ended calm way, ‘this happened,’ ” said psychiatrist and NBC TODAY contributor Dr. Gail Saltzon on Saturday. “But stay calm, because children take their cues from you. If you’re hysterical, they won’t even hear the information, they’ll hear your emotion. You want to be listening to what they are concerned about.”

Be honest, “but don’t over-inform about details.”

No one is expecting you to know everything or be able to guarantee your child perfect safety from the scum-sucking weasels of the world, but you can be there to listen to your child.

Talk to her, give him reassurance. You can offer them love and arms to hug. Give them information about what happened, but don’t put adult fear into young lives. They get enough of that from the real world already.

— Richard

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There’s Being Seduced By The Shiny, And Then There’s This

by Richard

I am easily seduced by the shiny and the new. If something flashy and technological comes out, I have to restrain myself from immediately jumping into the fray and snagging one of those beautiful, new and shiny things.

I admit it. I’m a technological neophile.

I am not, however, one of these dudes.

The iPad is great, and according to 10% of men, the iPad is better than sex.

A new poll conducted by RoxyPalace.com revealed that 1 in 10 men would rather have a new iPad than hook up with a new sexy girlfriend who can please them in ways no retina display ever could.

Okay, admittedly, this poll was taken in the United Kingdom and they’re a little . . . different over there, but, seriously? They’d rather have an iPad than be *ahem* with *ahem* a woman?

That’s just not right. Of course, if it’s the same 10 percent that self-identifies as homosexual, then that could explain a few things, but I have a feeling it’s not that neat.

There are always those oddball dudes who enjoy the security of their mamma’s basement more than interacting with real humans. Sadly, most of those guys aren’t even using their iPad to its fullest chick-pulling potential, as only 44% of the men surveyed said they had used an app to help resolve a relationship problem.

Which doesn’t even begin to bring the dudettes into the equation. With 10 percent of the dudes saying they’d rather have an iPad, you’d think the women would be at or greater than that. But, of course, you’d be wrong. Oh, so very wrong.

96 percent said they’d prefer to get a new man in their life rather than waste their money on the new iPad.

There’s also some good news in the poll. It turns out that 71 percent of the respondents would rather use the FaceTime video chatting app to talk with prospective dates before actually meeting them in person. It’s not actual human interaction, but it is a step in the right direction. And it can avoid a lot of those quick, furtive looks of crushing disappointment upon first seeing the mystery date.

So. To recap. I’m not one of those dudes. But they are out there. And they outnumber the women like that.

And iPads are all shiny and new and I want one. But not enough to pass up a night with my lovely wife, known to me as She Who Must Be Pleased.

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Sunday Serenade: Dr. Buz And The Medications

by Richard

Buz Burkhead is a pretty amazing dude. Not only is he one of the most gifted orthopedic surgeons in the south (and I’m limiting it to the south here because I don’t want him to start blushing too much) who can fix just about any shoulder injury, but he’s also a talented songwriter and singer.

Just so we’re clear, although I did have shoulder surgery late last year, I wasn’t able to go see Dr. Burkhead. I got the next best thing. My shoulder doc trained under Buz.

Buz is possibly the best doctor in music since that Hook fella. (And if you don’t know who Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show were, well, I feel sorry for you. And also for me because that means I am really, really old.)


Dr. Buz and the Medications tonight on your Sunday Serenade. And, no, they Ain’t Got No Tan Lines. And, no, I really didn’t want that picture in my head, but it’s too late. Still, here it is.


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