Tag Archives: Grade Tests

School’s Out

by Richard

School’s out for summer!

I’ll pause here to allow the cheers and screams and sheer undulations of joy to subside from the young dude peanut gallery that’s now got far too much time on its hands.

All done? Good.

Anyway, it’s an odd last day of school here at Casa de Dude. Sarcasmo bounced back from college during the first semester of last year, so he’s been out of school. Zippy the Monkey Boy went to a private school and had all A’s in his classes so didn’t have to study for or take final exams so he’s been out for several weeks and only had to go back to school last week to graduate.

It’s only Hyper Lad who’s counting today as the official first day of summer. The price we pay for allowing them to get older, I guess.

I still say we should dip them in amber sometime around six or so. That way, they never have to get into that cynical or sarcastic phase in which all parents are idiots and the world stinks. And we never have to deal with pre-puberty and puberty mood swings.

Unfortunately, every time I bring that up, people start looking at me strange and I get a visit from child protective services.


It’s been difficult to keep Hyper Lad on task these last couple of weeks, what with his brothers home and not doing any sort of school. He is seriously ticked off that he can’t stay up late and sleep late and not go to school. Not that I blame him, of course. I mean, since his End of Grade tests have ended a couple of weeks back, he’s been doing — essentially — nothing of value in school.

Still, it’s something all school-age dudes have to suffer through.

Now it’s all over. School’s out for the summer, so no more eight hours of school each day, and the young dudes get to stay home all the time.

Which is something all parent-age dudes have to suffer through.

Even with a house full of young dudes, all filled to the brim with a horrible concoction of hormones and energy, there still is something worthwhile to cling to: only a little over two months until school starts again.

Nah. Just kidding. I love having them home. I don’t have to harangue anyone about homework or tests or projects or getting up on time to get to school.

And I get a little more face time, another vanishingly small unit of time before they’re out of the house (hopefully) for good.

So school’s out and it’s time for fun.

Well, they get to have fun. For parents, it’s just more of the same. Only hotter. With more kids underfoot.

Don’t trip.

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End Of Grade

by Richard

Remember a couple of days ago, when I was talking to you dudes about proctoring the End of Grade tests at Carmel Middle School?

About how I’d be stuck in a room with no reading, no eating, no drinking and no telephony for more than four hours?

Remember how I scoffed at how dependent some people were on staying in contact with the internet?

Remember how I laughed at those poor, poor people?

Remember the parable about glass houses?

Yeah, turns out I’m one of those poor, poor people.

I’m taking today to recover. And by recover I mean stay with a cable plugged directly from our cable modem into my brain, via my right ear canal and my left nostril. It’s experimental, but I think it’s doing me some. . .

Oooh, look. It’s a unicorn kitty!

And it’s all sparkly and pretty.

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The Electrical Impulse

by Richard

I’m directly involved in the last significant event of the school year and it’s getting ready to kick off next week. Of course I’m talking about the NC End of Grade tests, dudes. What else would it be?

Of course, school doesn’t actually let out until June 10 here in the school district serving Casa de Dude, but, once the EOGs are over, there’s basically only some time marking and movie watching to finish out the year.

Anyway, I’m going to be a proctor for a couple of days during the EOG tests at Carmel Middle School. Because I’ll be in the classroom with a bunch of kids and one teacher, helping to make sure no one cheats or does something nasty, I had to be specially trained for about 30 minutes the other day.

Most of the training consisted of being read a pamphlet and having it reinforced that we shouldn’t read, eat or talk during the four hours of the EOG and neither should the teacher or students.

Which caused one of my fellow trainees to timidly raise her hand and ask if it was okay for a proctor to take and send an “important” text message during the test.

Just got me thinking is all. I used to be a substitute teacher at a middle school, back before the young dudes needed to have constant supervision. (Don’t ask) I used to spend all day in the classroom. With no PHONE AT ALL!!!!!

And, oddly, I survived.

Now we can’t get along without being in constant communication? We must be available and available to respond at every second of every single day?

I know. I shouldn’t complain. I also get the itchies when I go out of the house, hop into the super-cool and awesome mimi-van (I drive a mini-van. Mini-vans are cool!) and head out on an errand. Only to jerk upright in my seat, frantically patting the pocket in which I normally carry my phone.


There’s a feeling I get when I consider this, that it will be good for us to give up the electrical umbilical for a couple of hours. Even for the four hours it will take to proctor the EOG tests. Even during the four hours of the EOG tests, during which they just said I couldn’t pull out a book or a kindle to read.

You know, I might be rethinking my position here.

Let me google a couple of opinions and I’ll get back to you.

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