family

Choosing A Pre-School

Posted on February 8, 2010 at 12:01 am

by Richard

There’s snow on the ground, a cloudy, gray overcast sky up above and winter coats on the hook next to the back door. Sounds like the perfect time to begin making plans for August. What? You mean you haven’t started planning on where you’re going to stick enroll the little dude for pre-school? Whoa, Nellie, dude. You’re running behind. Here’s a little precis to try and help you keep up.

A little, handy guide (hence the name of the site) to finding the right pre-school that fits with your family.

1. First of all, while recommendations are nice, there’s nothing like a little first-hand experience. I mean, it’s nice that the family down the street loves the Lightbringer’s Academy for Little Devils (an actual Biblical joke! Will wonders never cease?), but you still need to do a little on-site investigation. Try stopping by the prospective little dude warehouse pre-school when they’re not expecting you. It’ll give you a better idea of what the school is really like.

2. Understand that a pre-school isn’t really a warehouse for the under-kindergarten set, no matter what jokes I make. It’s purpose really is to get the little dudes and dudettes ready to attend school. (Oddly enough, when I started school, I went straight into kindergarten without all that fancy lernin’ stuff they’re doing with the young wippersnappers these days.) Anyway, you need to make sure the school has a curriculum of which you approve. That doesn’t mean the school needs to have an academic curriculum, just that it’s structured and will help the little dudes focus on learning specific skills. There needs to be a mix of “academic” activities and play time.

3. Equally important as the “academics” of a pre-school is whether or not it offers enrichment classes such as dance, literacy or music. Admittedly literacy is a pretty advanced concept for a four-year-old, but, hey, it works. Dance and music stuff is not only important in broadening little minds, but it’s also a heck of a lot of fun. Try to make sure the school you choose has a separate room for these sorts of activities. It gives the little dudettes and dudes a sense of what real school will be like.

4. Here’s a little homework for you. When you’re researching pre-schools, it’s probably a good idea to keep notes. And, what better way to keep notes, than by whipping out the ol’ spreadsheet program and getting to work? Okay, you can probably just use a pencil and paper, but I like computers. Things you might want to keep track of: cost, how far the school is from home, start and end times, days available, dates applications are due, what the teachers are like. This sort of thing will be helpful when you’re trying to winnow down the list.

5. Here’s an important, but grubby detail. Can you afford the school you like? It does the little dude no good if you find the perfect school for him, sign him up and then go bankrupt trying to get out from under the tuition, application fee and deposit. Not only that, but some school will also charge for materials and other incidentals used by students. Then there’s the possible extra charge if you’re late picking the little dudette up, that sort of thing. Money matters. Make sure you can comfortably keep up.

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Mosh Pit

Posted on January 26, 2010 at 12:01 am

by Richard

I think I might have made a mistake. I know. Hardly surprising, but I really had such good intentions with this one. I mean, what could go wrong by bringing three little dudes, aged 10 to 16, to a bar for a concert on a school night? See? Perfectly innocuous, right? Right?

It began, as do so many strange adventures, with Zippy the Monkey Boy having an idea. This time it didn’t involve explosions, grand theft auto (the charge, not the game) or slimy ocean creatures so I was pretty open to hearing about it. He wanted to go see a concert. See, last year around St. Patrick’s Day, Zippy the Monkey Boy and I discovered a new (to us) band called Cage the Elephant. They had this great song on the AltNation channel on XM radio. We loved it. Eventually we (read I) bought the CD and spread the love to the rest of the dudes and little dudes in the house.

A dude at Zippy’s school had said he had tickets for Cage the Elephant’s show here in Charlotte. Zippy, of course, was insanely jealous and wanted to go to the show. I said I’d think about it and promptly forgot about it (parental privilege). About the thirteenth time Zippy brought it back up I caved and looked into the concert. I thought it was being held on a Saturday (actually a Sunday) at a concert venue (actually a bar) so I said why not and bought four tickets, one each for George of the Jungle, Speed Racer, Zippy and for me. I haven’t told my wife, known to me as She Who– Quick! Hide. She’s Coming, about this yet. I might need bandages.

Now, we’ve done concerts before, most notably Jimmy Buffett. But that one was significantly family friendly. I’ve got a feeling this alt-rock concert held at a bar will be, um, different, to say the least. Mind-numbingly, taboo-shatteringly almost-riotously different, to say close to the most.

Should I survive both the concert and the wifely aftermath, I’ll let you know how it went.

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Me First And The Gimmie Gimmies*

Posted on January 18, 2010 at 12:01 am

by Richard

When dads sit down around the campfire after a long day of herding little dudes and cleaning up after them, there’s a cautionary tale that gets told to the shivers of the listeners. It goes something like this.

There was a family with three little dudes and or dudettes. It doesn’t matter. The family was planning a vacation to somewhere warm, sandy and delightful. As they were doing the final pack up, they heard the news. At the resort, a bird who’s species is on the verge of extinction had flown into the engine of a fully loaded jet as it was coming in for a landing. The jet went down in a ball of flame, killing all on board as well as wiping out the resort and causing a fire that devastated the tiny island.

“Oh, how horrible,” said the mom.

“That’s just terrible,” said the dad as he began to unpack their suitcases.

The middle little dude looked on, aghast. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

“Wait,” he said. “Why are you unpacking? That doesn’t affect me, does it? Well, find something else.”

And the group around the campfire shivers, knowing the little dude just didn’t get it. All he worried about was whether or not he was going to get something. The dads hoped they were raising their little dudes to be better than that. They picked up their plates of beans and started a fart contest. Whatddya want? They’re dudes.

The problem is that little dude’s reaction wasn’t all that unusual. There’s little dudes all over the world that only care about something if it affects them, or how they want to do stuff. I may, just may, know this from personal experience. Maybe.

I’m not sure why this happens. I’m not sure how a little dude becomes so focused on himself that he sees the entire world through the lens of how it will affect him. I think, though, there are some ways to work with the non-functional-brained little dudes.

One way is the bait and switch. Offer the little dude something he or she really wants, or says he or she does, and then make it contingent on doing something nice for someone more than once. Or tell them they can’t have it. And then give it to them only after they’ve made an unprompted gesture of niceness toward another member of the family.

I think we need to make sure kids like these widen their perspective more than a little bit. Let themselves see the outside world has more to offer and needs more from the people living in it than what happens to them.

*not the band, although they’re awesome.

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