Tag Archives: Expression

Game Of Thrones . . . Event Reaction

I am a huge “Game of Thrones” fan, mostly of the book series by George R.R. Martin. I’ve been reading them mostly day-of-release for the books. Absolutely fantastic stuff.

When the tv series came out, I, of course, started watching it. The odd thing is that my wife, known to me as She Who Must Be Looking For Something To Do, actually started watching with me. I liked the show. She became obsessed. So much so that my wife, known to me as She Who Must Be Doing Anything To Avoid Reading She Doesn’t Have To Do, actually requested I buy her the book series.

Which I did.

Now, I’ve done this before and, you know, she’d start off and maybe read a chapter or two. And this would be spread out over months and months. Not this time. She actually powered through the books and, when the so-far last book came out, requested that one and read it as well. It’s funny, really.

As she’s been watching the third season on HBO, she’s been pointing out what is different from the books.

The thing to know about my wife, known to me as She Who Must Be Constantly Interrupting The Show To Ask Another Question, is that, while she’s tremendously intelligent, she can’t remember media she’s consumed for anything. She doesn’t even remember whether or not we have seen a movie, much less a semi-important plot point within. I tell you that to explain what happened in the second-to-last episode of Game of Thrones on HBO. There’s an . . . event that happens. It’s a rather large event and very, very shocking.

Somehow, she’d managed to forget about the . . . event until right up to just a few minutes before it happened. Then she watched the TV in horror. “Surely,” she whispered, “they wouldn’t do that.”

Turns out. . . they would. And gleefully, it seems.

Now I’m not the type to forget media I consume. For the most part. So I realized what was coming and saw it from a mile away. I was smug about the whole thing. Especially when I went online later and found out there were people who HADN’T read the books and were simply discovering the story by watching the show.

They were floored. Couldn’t believe it. Nor could my wife, known to me as She Who Must Be Written Out Quickly As I’m Having Difficulty Coming Up With So Many New Nicknames, who kept staring blankly at the screen for long after the . . . event was over.

So. Over and done with. Until I found this .gif. Not sure where it comes from, but it perfectly captures the mood in our house. I’d have to add Zippy the College Boy as one of the two ladies, not that he’s a lady, just for his expression. I’m the right smug bastard in the middle. It’s just perfect.

Red Wedding Reaction Yeah. Again, sorry about that

What can I say? I can be a smug little weasel. I know this.

Now, so do you dudes.







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Dog-Day Afternoon

by Richard

Dogs have some astounding expressions, provided you use a little anthropomorphism (the attribution of human thoughts and feelings to non-human objects or organisms). All of which goes a long way toward explaining why Buzz, the garbage disposal that walks like a dog.

We were out for a walk when Buzz suddenly stopped in the middle of the street. He faced forward with an intent look on his face that could only mean one thing: Squirrel. The perfect combination of twitch, furry and small size. Buzz loves to chase squirrels.

We were about 20 feet away from the squirrel, which was out in the open and in perfect position to be caught.

I, however, didn’t feel like getting dragged along.

With that in mind, I decided to do something about it. I cleared my throat and then barked loudly. Several times.

The squirrel looked up and then scampered off away up a tree.

Buzz turned to look at me, an expression of hurt confusion on his furry face.

I could clearly read that expression and it was as if he was speaking out loud: Dude, you suck as a wingman.

What could I say? He was right.

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Shoulder To Shoulder

by Richard

I don’t know the name of the movie, but that doesn’t really matter, because this thing is everywhere. I was watching some sort of generic action thriller movie and there was a gunfight. To show just how tough our hero was, he got shot and then kept fighting and won the fight. So where do you think our hero was shot? (No fair peeking at the title of this post.)

Yep. You guessed it. He was shot in the shoulder.

A little blood. A tight close-up on his face as he grimaced in pain, moving out a little to let us see our hero clutching his shoulder with his good hand. And then a snarl as he launched himself immediately back into the fray.

At which point I just turned the television off. Because, really? Enough is enough.

If our hero was really shot in the shoulder? Have an idea what he would really do? Scream, cry, whine, bleed a whole heck of a lot, scream some more, writhe around on the floor weeping in agony, call for a time out, beg for a doctor. Just about anything except clutch at his shoulder for a second, smile mirthlessly at the bad guy and then start beating people up, usually using both arms.

Nuh uh. Not gonna happen.

I know this for a fact. See, I went in for shoulder surgery. I was under general anesthesia. I had a catheter dripping a local anesthetic into my shoulder for two days after the operation. I had pain pills. I had a highly skilled (and I do mean highly skilled {Howdy, Dr. S. and thanks!]) doctor performing a minimally invasive surgical procedure. I had everything in my favor to make my shoulder surgery as low-pain as possible.

And here I am today, having just bumped that shoulder pretty hard into a wall (Buzz, the garbage disposal that walks like a dog, decided it would be a lot of fun to try and practice his ski slalom skills using my moving legs as flags), and I’m in agony. Five weeks after my surgery.

When a bullet enters your body, it’s traveling at a pretty fast clip. All that kinetic energy gets quickly transferred to your flesh, the hydrostatic shock (the power of speed converting to movement, thus causing hugely explosive ripples to expand outward from the bullet’s path) is what does most of the damage. It is rough. It is not something you just (you should pardon the expression, especially since I just got back my ability to do it) shrug off.

I know getting shot in the shoulder is action-movie shorthand for “our hero is in danger, he’s been hurt, but he’s strong enough to overcome any obstacle to continue fighting for (insert movie’s objective here). he’s tough and you should like him and want to be him.” I get that.

Doesn’t mean I have to like it, though.

Maybe we could pick another designated tough-guy-gets-shot-but-overcomes-pain-and-keeps-fighting spot? The ear? Or maybe a foot. Yeah, that would be good. We could see tough-guy action dude hopping and skipping around while they fight. That should be good for a laugh or two.

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