A Dude's Guide » Countdown

Lo, The Countdown Begins Anew

Richard — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 05:01:02 +0000

by Richard

Welcome to October, the most wonderful month of the year. It’s the month when we get to plumb deep into the depths of our fractured psyches, sift through out gooey id and find the most wonderful costumes to bring out our inner us.

Or, conversely, it’s when we can slap on a cheap costume, buy tons of candy and gain 15 pounds just before going into diabetic shock. Your choice, really. I know which one I’m going with.

All hail the Pumpkin King! It’s the month of Halloween!

Speaking as someone who loves Talk Like A Pirate Day far, far too much, let me tell you, Halloween is now and has always been and will always be, the greatest American holiday around.

The candy. The costumes. Scaring the little kids walking around just a little too unwarily. Guessing who’s who. Scaring more little kids. Dressing up in ways that will embarrass your little dudes and dudettes to no end (always easy, but never more so than now). Scaring little kids. And, oh yeah, eating candy.

Perhaps I am a little juvenile about this, but I don’t care. I love Halloween!

Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time I got the rest of the Halloween decorations (all seven boxes of them) out of the attic, unpacked and put in their proper places. I suggest you get to it as well. I mean, there are only 30 days left until the big event. I know you won’t want to miss it.

Tags: A Dude's Guide to Life, American Holiday, Boxes, Candy, Costumes, Countdown, Diabetic Shock, dress, dude, Dude's, Dudette, Dudettes, eat, Hail, Halloween, Halloween Decorations, Juvenile, kids, little dude, little dudes, Little Kids, love, Month Of The Year, Psyches, Pumpkin King, richard, Talk Like A Pirate, Talk Like A Pirate Day

Independence Day

Richard — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 05:01:54 +0000

The aliens have arrived. We’ve found a signal in the static. It’s a countdown. I’m sure it’s nothing, though. They’d never have a saucer hovering over the White House if they meant us harm. Right?

Oops.

Well, I guess it’s a good thing I’m not talking about the movie, Independence Day, but rather about the holiday of the same name.

Yes, I love July 4th and not just because it’s a good day to blow stuff up. Well, a particularly good day to blow stuff up. I mean, let’s face it: every day is a good day to blow stuff up.

Quick question: Do they have July 4th in England? Not-so-quick answer: Yes, of course. It comes right between July 3rd and July 5th. They just don’t celebrate American independence day on July 4th. Heh. Trick question.

Anyway, I do love Independence Day. I’m not one of those “‘Murica, love it or leave it” types, but I do love this country. Despite all the flaws, it’s a great place to be. Let me paraphrase an old saying: America is the worst country in the world, excpet for all the others. Yes, our country’s face is full of warts, but it’s a nice face anyway. Especially now that we’re not actively torturing people. Sorry. Politics just slipped out.

Moving on. I love this country so much I’m willing to sacrafice any kind of important content so I can go out, cook on the grill, blow stuff up with the little dudes and eat Fresca Floats, which really are better than they sound.

You need to get out there as well. Go. Have fun.

– Richard

Tags: A Dude's Guide to Life, Aliens, American Independence Day, better, Blow, cook, Countdown, dude, Dude's, eat, England, Face, house, Independence Day, July 3rd, July 4th, lie, little dude, little dudes, love, movie, People, politics, richard, Sacrafice, Stuff, Trick Question, Warts, White House

To Boldly Go. . .

Richard — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 05:01:40 +0000

The creator of Star Trek and his computer wife will be traveling the cosmos together, even after their deaths. Stick with me here, it’s not just a geekout moment. Gene Roddenberry is the man responsible for, or culpable for if you’re just not that into it, for Star Trek in all its myriad forms. His wife, Majel Barrett Roddenberry, had rolls in just about every iteration of the show. She played the voice of the Enterprise’s computer, hence the mention of a computer wife.

Roddenberry died back in 1991 and his wife had part of his remains sent out to space on a Celestis rocket in 1997. Well, Majel Barrett Roddenberry died in December of last year. Now, the remaining remains of both will be placed in a specially hardened container and shot out into space. There, it will continue on a trek across the stars, never to return to Earth.

Oddly enough, launching ashes into space is the subject of my latest short story. It’s called “Countdown” and it’s in an online magazine called Aoife’s Kiss. You can go read it here. And, if you like it, feel free to vote for it as the best of the issue and get your humble author/blogger into the print version of the magazine‘s best of the year issue. But that’s not really why I wanted to talk to you about this. Just a bit of shameless self promotion.

Actually, I think it’s kind of romantic, in a zombie-infected sort of way. I mean, here are these two people who loved each other very much, even more than they loved their shared dream. And now, after death, they get to spend eternity exploring their shared dream of the cosmos. Well, speaking metaphorically of course. Because I’m not sure just how much enjoyment a couple of cans full of ashes can get out of, well, anything. Still, it makes as much sense as having embalmed bodies buried next to each other.

So, congratulations to the late Majel Barrett Roddenberry and Gene Roddenberry, who have set out to boldly go where no dead people have gone before. Their eternal mission to just keep on going, missing any impacts on orbiting bodies. I wish them well.

– Richard

Tags: A Dude's Guide to Kids, Blogger, Cans, Countdown, Deaths, dude, Dude's, Earth, Embalmed Bodies, Eternity, Free Vote, Gene Roddenberry, Humble Author, Iteration, Kiss, love, Majel Barrett, Majel Barrett Roddenberry, men, Metaphor, Metaphorically, Self Promotion, Short Story, space, Star Trek, Stars, travel, wife, Zombie

A Dude's Guide » Countdown

Lo, The Countdown Begins Anew

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