Maybe If You Hum A Few Bars? Now Hum Lower. . . Lower. . .

by Richard

It turns out that music in the bedroom can actually lead some to feel more amorous, more inclined to actually get a little dirty, dancing there in the sheets.

You see what I did there? That was a little neurolinguistic programming there, getting you dudes set up for the bad news.

Brace yourselves. Ready? You’re sure? Okay, here it is.

According to a survey commissioned by the online music service Spotify, the most arousing music to play in the bedroom is the soundtrack to the 80’s movie Dirty Dancing.

Yeah. I know. I’m having a real hard time getting over that knowledge myself.


“Dirty Dancing” was the top pick for both men and women, although the study’s author, music psychologist Daniel Mullensiefen, also pointed out that men are more willing to adjust their tastes in music in order to ensure “greater success in the bedroom.”

Good on you, dudes. Rather than show a little spine, you’ll wimp out and let the lady play the music she wants to hear all so you can do a little sheet romp. Okay, yeah. I understand that’s important, but the question I’ve got is. . . What are you doing with anyone who thinks Dirty Dancing is a good movie?

Another surprise finding? Respondents said music playing in the background is 40% more likely to turn them on than the touch or feel of their partner.

Rather not listen to “Will You Love Me Tomorrow” during sex? Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing” placed second on the list, with Ravel’s “Bolero” finishing third.

So, yes, we like music. Some of us like it a lot. But this? Music that’s better than sex? No. Sorry. Maybe an entire concert with your best friends, with your favorite band playing the best songs ever, might, maybe, possibly approach within shouting distance. But better? No. Especially not these songs.

One in three participants identified Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody” as a song that is “better than sex.” Next on the list was “Sex on Fire” by Kings of Leon and “Angels” by Robbie Williams. Mullensiefen describes these as songs that take unexpected turns that we respond to in highly emotional, but positive, ways.

The study interviewed 2,000 people in the United Kingdom between the ages of 18 and 91, with an almost equal gender split.

Those folks need to really rethink their priorities.

Meanwhile, I’m going to do a little changing around on my “special” playlist, you know, the one I play when I’m with She Who Must Be Seeing Dirty Dancing At Least Once A Year.

Not my fault. I didn’t find out about this horrible thing until much later into the marriage. By then it was too late.

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