How Young Is Too Young?
by Richard
Way back when. . .
I was in college and, by golly, I was a man, an all-growed-up man. No question about it. And because I was a man (and I was a man, make no mistake) I was going to look like a man.
I grew out my hair. (Ah, the good ole days when that was a possibility instead of wish fulfillment.) I grew some truly hideous facial hair that I thought was fantastic.
And I got my ear pierced. My left ear. Because that’s the way it was done where I come from. Men, if you were men and loved the ladies like I did, only got their ears pierced on the left side. The other side meant you were batting for the other team, if you know what I mean.
*sigh*
Basically I was young and dumb and thought if I wore an earring on my right ear it would advertise that I was gay. *in best falsetto voice* Oh, noes! Not that! *back to regular voice* Hey, dudes, I said I was young and dumb.
Anyway.
I went out and got my ear pierced because I was a man. I was an adult. I could do what I wanted. And I did. Right up until my grandparents, who lived relatively close by, asked me to come over for dinner.
At which point, I panicked. I’d just pierced my ear so I couldn’t take it out because the hole would close over instantly. (Again, young and dumb.) So I went out and purchased some (certainly not racist) flesh-colored bandages. I cut off the sticky part and then carefully applied it to cover said earring.
I have great grandparents. They actually went along with the gag. I pretended they couldn’t tell and they pretended I wasn’t an idiot. After my dinner, they called my mom and asked, “Why was he covering up his earring with that band aid?”
Apparently I was old enough to go ahead and get my ear pierced without anyone in my family hierarchy freaking right the frack out. Yay for me.
Okay. I told you that story so I could ask you this question: What if I’d been in high school? Middle school? Elementary? What if I’d wanted a tattoo instead of an earring?
What if I ran out of room today and had to come back tomorrow to answer these questions?
I guess we’ll find out tomorrow.
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