• Murder Most Foul

  Filed under A Dude's Guide to Kids
  Oct 24

  by Richard

  Oddly enough, I’m not going to make a pun about foul/fowl. I know. Hard to believe. Still, this is a serious topic. See, yesterday I wanted to kill someone. Well, okay, not kill them, but at least maim them severely and with such gruesome force and malevolence that the beating would stand as a holy terror to those who would do similar for generations.

  Full of myself just a bit, I know. It’s just that I really get irked when I see some unthinking jerk to this. Basically, they were trying to kill some kids. Or, if not kill, then at least damage.

  See, they were speeding through a school zone. Now, I know that I’ll probably be the first to speed most anywhere, but I will not and have never done more than the speed limit in a school zone. Admittedly, it might be because I saw a friend of mine get hit by a car and fly up into the air, broken, before plummeting to the ground. That sort of thing leaves a mental scar.

  Whatever the cause, though, I do know that speeding through a school zone is a good way to hurt some kid darting out into the street. That’s why you have to go slower.

  This lady, though, clearly didn’t pay attention. I was just entering the school zone on Friday at 25 mph and this lady passed me like I was standing still. Going 50 at least. Because of a turning lane in front of the school, she had to stop just where I had to turn. I pulled up to her, controlling my seething anger, and wagged my finger at her while hanging out the window.

  “Slow down. It’s a school zone!” She looked over at me and then deliberately turned her head to the front and pulled away.

  I got back in the car.

  “Well, that was embarrassing,” said the appallingly appropriately named Speed Racer.

  At which point I took the time to explain the importance of obeying the speed limit in school zones for the next 47 seconds until he had to get out to go to school.

  Still, I’d like to reiterate this for added emphasis: You don’t ever — ever — speed through a school zone. Set a good example for your little dudes and let the other little dudes live.

  • Spread the word, dude!

  Tags: A Dude's Guide to Kids, Added Emphasis, anger, dude, Fly, Foul Fowl, friend, Generations, Holy Terror, Jerk, kids, little dude, little dudes, Malevolence, men, Pay Attention, Pun, race, richard, Scar, school, School Zone, Speed Limit, Speed Racer, T Pay
  
  Tagged as: Added Emphasis, anger, dude, Fly, Foul Fowl, friend, Generations, Holy Terror, Jerk, kids, little dude, little dudes, Malevolence, men, Pay Attention, Pun, race, richard, Scar, school, School Zone, Speed Limit, Speed Racer, T Pay
  
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