Okay, not really. I mean, come on. When I’ve got something like this, well, I’ve just got to comment on it. Go ahead, click on the word “this” in the last sentence. I mean, seriously, take the time, read the story and then get back to me. I’ll wait.
Back already? That was quick. So, there I was, innocently cruising the new sites, trying to avoid politics, but still find something interesting, when I stumbled across that story. After I stopped laughing at the headline, I thought — to myself — I need to share this. Of course, I turned to my wife, known to me as She Who — no, never mind. That joke was just too easy. Also? She’d probably kill me and I’ve got things to do next week.
My wife (Must. Resist. Joke.) couldn’t believe it, so I had to read the whole thing to her. It took about a half hour because I couldn’t stop laughing. If you haven’t clicked through already to read the article, please do. Otherwise, I’ll seem like a completely insensitive cad. And just let me state that the reason I found this whole thing funny, despite a pretty serious topic, was the stereotypical reactions of both males and females to the act described. I’m not saying breast cancer is funny. My mom survived it, so I know it’s not a fun thing. Anyway, back to making me seem like an insensitive cad. The line that made me lose it was the following:
“The University researchers stressed that, though breast cancer is relatively uncommon, any steps taken to reduce the risk would be a wise decision.”
I finished reading the article, finally got control of myself and turned to look at my wife. (stay strong. stay strong.)
“Well?” she asked.
“I can protect you,” I said. “Right now, even. Because I’m just that kind of a nice dude.”
She threw a pillow at me.
– Richard
Tags: A Dude's Guide to Life, A Dude's Guide to Marriage, Breast Cancer, Cad, dude, Dude's, fellatio, Fun Thing, funny, Half Hour, Joke, Laugh, laughing, Males And Females, men, mom, pill, politics, reading, research, risk, search, University Researchers, wife, Wise Decision
I forwarded this link to someone who shall remain nameless. She responded with “Um, I think this is fake. The quotes don’t seem real.”
If you’re not SURE it’s fake, shouldn’t you FALL FOR IT? Some questions are too weighty to ponder on a Friday…
Got ‘cha: http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/bl_fell_cancer_cure.htm
But, it is proven that regular fe**atio would fix the economy, end world hunger and cause global peace.