A Dude's Guide. . . to everything

“Prourrified” (c)

Is it possible to be proud and terrified at the same time?

I’m going to have to go with yes, seeing as how I’m experiencing it right now.

You see, my oldest little dude (not so little any more at 6 foot 1 inches and 14 years old) is headed out of town, out on his own (sort of) in the wilds of Duke University. I’m proud of the dude because he is in the Duke Talent Identification Program, which provides kids who score well on standardized tests in the third grade, with academic enrichment opportunities. I’m terrified because he’ll be up there for the entire weekend without me to take care of him. There will be Duke TIP staff there, but he’ll be on his own in a hotel, with only a room mate and a floor monitor somewhere somewhat nearby.

I’ve started trying to loosen the iron fist of parental guidance in his television watching, but this is a whole ‘nother escalation. When I think about it, I’m not really all that worried about him. I’m worried that I did a good enough job raising the little dude. Can he think on his feet? Can he be responsible enough? Will he remember to put on deodorant in the mornings?

I think I have to believe that the little dude has learned enough, if not from me or his mother, then on his own. He’s a smart, capable dude. Now I get to learn if he’s smart and capable enough. And that prospect is enough to terrify me, even though I’m so very proud of the dude for trying.

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You Cant Control Everyting

Tonight we had to be somewhere at a certain time. The kids still needed us to do the normal nighttime routine and stuff. Of course, I had a last minute late call to make and was also running late. For some reason being late always stresses me out. I tend to get ornery and snap orders to the troops. Well the truth is, who cares if I’m late? They can wait. My family is #1. Everything else just is not worth the stress.

Dudes! gotta realize that when there are kids in the picture, you can’t be in control of everything.

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Crackers (Excerpt from the book A Dude’s Guide to Babies by Richard and Barry)

You might wish morning sickness was a myth, but, Dude!, it’s not. Fortunately it doesn’t happen to every single woman who gets pregnant. But, when it does, it’s not fun. We wish we could write some thing funny about morning sickness but it’s very scary. However, it does remind us of those good old college days.

This little biological gem is thought to be caused by way too much estrogen running riot through a woman’s body. Basically, morning sickness results in a woman waking up in the morning and rushing to the bathroom to vomit up whatever’s in her stomach. Although it’s called morning sickness, it can happen at any time during the day. For the most part, morning sickness vanishes sometime after the first trimester.

Here’s another tip. When she’s sicking up in the bathroom, don’t just lay there in the bed wishing she’d get it over with quickly so you can go back to sleep. Get your lazy butt up, go in there and help. Whether it be holding her hair out of the way, getting a wet towel to wipe her mouth, or even just rubbing on her back so you can be there for her. Do not roll over and pretend to sleep through it. She’ll know. And do not run around panicking asking “What do I do,? What do I do?” Just remember high school and college hangovers. Get some water and just be there.

Most of those fancy blogs and books recommend that, to fight morning sickness, women should lie still in bed and then eat some dry crackers before getting up. That’s probably a pretty good idea, no matter that you might have to brush cracker crumbs out of the bed. If it stops her throwing up, isn’t that worth a few cracker crumbs in the bed? You know you’ve had worse in bed so deal with it.

Dudes! realize pregnancy is not something that just happens to her. When she’s pregnant, so are you and it will make it easier if you accept this as soon as possible.

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